Lace Overlay Linden Sweatshirt…and Post-Baby Body Issues

By Lauren Dahl on June 15, 2015 in Mommyhood, Sewing, Uncategorized

I’m sewing again! Woohoo! Actually, I never stopped sewing - but I haven’t been blogging because I haven’t been able to fit into the things I’ve been sewing, or I haven’t been happy with how I’ve looked in the things I’ve sewn (yet). I’ll talk about that shortly. First, let me show you my lace overlay Linden Sweatshirt!

The main portion of the shirt is Pendleton French terry I purchased at the local store when it was on sale a few months ago. The lace overlay was purchased at JoAnn Fabrics. I think they still have it in stores! I found the ribbing at Mill End here in Portland.

As all Linden Sweatshirts do, this top came together quickly and easily BUT…duh duh duh…my ribbing was super stretchy with little recovery, AND, the French terry turned out to be equally squishy. So, when I put this thing on after making it in a size 6, it was H.U.G.E.

(For clarification and reference as always, my non-pregnant measurements of 34-27-37 put me in a Grainline 4, so I made this in a 6 so it would sort of fit postpartum and also fit down the road as a slouchy sweatshirt. In these photos, I am more like 38-32-40, for reference. I am 5’6″ and 150 lbs as pictured. Normally I am about 120-125.)

So, I did what any normal person would do, and I chopped off all the ribbing to try again. I serged an inch off each side to begin with, then I dramatically reduced the length of the ribbing for the neckline, hem band and cuffs. This was not a fault of the pattern at all; rather, my fabric was uniquely stretchy with poor recovery. I think the ribbing had a significant amount of rayon it it…seriously, no recovery. It’s nothing like the cotton/lycra ribbing I’m used to. It’s super soft and comfy though.

Once I had the fit issues worked out, I was very happy with this top. The neckline is a little wider than I’d like since I had to cut off the original (I can’t be bothered with unpicking serging from loop terry - no way, no how), but it kind of gives the shirt a slouchy, lived-in feel.

Now, about those body issues…I’m going to save the bulk of this discussion for its own post when I have time to collect my thoughts and am not waiting for my infant to wake up from his nap. Suffice it to say that when I grabbed my camera to peek at these photos after my husband took them, I was semi-mortified. Seriously, all I could see was my large chin, my mom hair, voluminous back and my flat butt.

I kind of wanted to cry. Then, I realized, I just had a baby a month ago. I suppose I look pretty darn good for that - especially since I’ve had three babies in less than four whirlwind years. And yes, I know, you’ll all re-assure me that I look great. I really appreciate that. But you know? I’m not myself. When I look at photos or in the mirror, I see someone I thought I’d never become. It’s not so much about the weight; no, it’s more about my overall fitness and health.

You see, I didn’t JUST have three babies. I’ve let so many things fall by the wayside - things that didn’t matter when I was 22. Back then, I could stay up all night, eat McDonald’s for every meal and drink soda like water. Perhaps it wasn’t healthy, but it wasn’t evident in my body shape or my health. But now, I’m older. I’m more tired. My metabolism is slower. I feel like I started having babies at 29 when everything on my body was in its proper place and shape, and then, I woke up five years later with three kids, 15 years added to my face and a body I don’t recognize.

Can anyone else relate?

Again, I know it’s only been a month. It took 4 months/8 months with my other two kids to lose my baby weight. But this isn’t just about weight; it’s about overall health. I want to be running around having fun with my grandkids in 30 years. I don’t want my body to continue breaking down at an unreasonable rate. And damnit, I want to look good in my jeans again! (And can I have my blonde hair back??!!)

Anyway, like I said…I plan to blog more about this at length and even post photos (gasp) of my immediate post-baby body. I think it’s important for me to come to terms with how motherhood has changed me physically (permanent and non-permanent), and I also want to share the reality (and possibility!) of it with others.

Stay tuned.

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Renee Hartley

Yes, I can relate. It took me almost 2 years to get back to where I was pre-pregnancy. After that, I was so burnt out from trying to get healthy and fit that I let it go for the following 2 years and gained it all back! In the past I lost weight just by cutting out the junk for a while and 2 miles a day…now it requires counting calories and hours of running/resistance training daily. I hate to admit that it has to be a lifestyle now or the weight will come back I just want to have a vacation from the weight battle without consequences.
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  I am having SUCH a hard time avoiding junk food! It really is my nemesis. Just today, I wanted to bake a batch of cookies SO BAD. Ahhhhhh….silly babies. 😉
Sally

This is why I have followed your blog for so long… You are honest as well as a fantastic sewing mentor. With three kids, your activity will increase ALOT…so youve got that going for you! You can do it!
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  Oh, Sally, thank you so much. You’re right - it’s non-stop around here!
Julie Crawford

It took me over a year to lose the pregnancy weight, and I found it was easier to shift once I went back to work and had a little more freedom in my day- I could regulate my eating better by packing a healthy lunch and snacks, and made sure to go for big walks, fitting in some quick squats or jumping jacks when in the ladies room. Getting a fitbit also helped me get moving. I totally understand not feeling your normal self, and not feeling pretty, after having a baby- I blog as well, and when I look at the photos in the months after my daughter was born, I looked pale, exhausted, and doughy. But you are beautiful! And you had a baby a month ago. I totally get wanting to get back to being yourself, but you have to be realistic about how long it takes. Oh, and I cut my hair shoulder length when I was pregnant, and immediately thought it gave me sitcom mom hair. I totally feel more me with long hair.
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  Sitcom mom! I love it, and it’s perfect! I can’t wait for it to grow back out. I miss my long, blond (fake, haha) locks! xoxo
http://lilysageandco.blogspot.com/ Debbie Iles

Oh yes! I was so sick with my pregnancies that I would lose weight, but look rather green and haggard throughout. But that baby tummy definitely takes longer to snap back after baby number three. I think it was a good 8 months before mine flattened third time round. I’m thankful that where we lived at the time meant that I could be very active with my babes, walking and pushing a truckload of weight in a double pram up hills. I swear that made me fitter than I was when I used to go to the gym! After bubs, breastfeeding also affects women differently so it’s not always fair to assume weight will drop off for everyone. I gained weight (but I needed to!) with mine. I say give yourself at least a year. I think I looked like a shadow of myself until at least 12mths had passed, and then the body seems to find its way back. But you definitely have to make a concerted effort to help it when you are in your thirties, but baby steps go along way - for me it was getting enough veggies and walking everywhere.
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  Baby steps! Yes! So hard, but I am trying to be patient and take your advice.
http://girlsinthegarden.blogspot.com/ Lori

I have to walk 3 miles a day to keep the weight off and I am 52 years old (also, try to avoid the snacks) . I really need to do some weight training but really when I get home from work, I like to walk down the road and stay home. I do love your new top, the lace fabric is so pretty.
I am struggling with finding my style and have had better luck at RTW garments than sewing. My main problem is wanting to try all the latest indie patterns and I bounce around everywhere instead of making what works for me! I do think you look great and enjoy all your little ones.
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  It’s so hard to make your own clothes when you don’t have a great idea of your personal style. For me, I feel like I have such limited time, it’s easier to go to the store and try things on for fit. But I am trying to be patient and find some patterns that really work for me!
http://thelittlecave.wordpress.com Dalia

I can relate so much. My boy is almost three weeks old, and I hesitate to blog about even the dresses I especially made for breastfeeding/physical transition phase. I also had some very unkind things to say about myself as I looked at our monthly pregnancy pictures and the first with-baby picture. Things I would never say or think about another woman, because pregnancy sucks, giving birth is a nightmare and taking care of a newborn and yourself is just so hard. (Yes, I just learned these truths, it is my first kid.) I also think the postpartum-models don’t help, even though I try to look at “real” women more. So thank you for keeping it real.
That being said, you look good! And the sweater looks so comfy, it makes me want to copy the look for winter.
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  Thanks so much, Dalia! We really do have to think carefully about how we talk to ourselves, especially after we’ve done such a miraculous and difficult thing! xoxo
Saskia

What a brave post. I can totally relate and remember myself worrying about my weight and health and trying to pick up a regular exercise regime right after my third was born. But then life got in the way, and I let it slip. And only now, two years later, I feel that there is enough time in my life room in my head to actually do something about it. Don’t be too hard on yourself: you look great! One important lesson that I’ve learned is that there is one health-related thing that you should really prioritize above everything: sleep! Getting enough/more sleep will make you feel more energetic and see everything in perspective.
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  Ahhh, sleep. I will get there. You know, in a few months. Hopefully. 😉
Fabric Epiphanies

After baby number one I was back to my normal weight within two months. After baby number two, I never quite got there but nearly. After baby number three, it took getting sick to get back to my normal weight and it didn’t last. You haven’t let anything slip, you have just re prioritized. Time is precious and exercise is time consuming. I found the easiest way to exercise after baby number three was to walk. I had my two youngest in the pram and the oldest on a bike. I walked to preschool, and the shops and often just to see that there was life outside my four walls. You are doing well to find time for sewing and I love your Linden.
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  You’re right - it really is about incorporating exercise into my daily regime and giving it time. Thank you for your comment.
Francesca Amodeo

i’ve never had a baby but I can tell you, it’s never too late to get healthy again. My sis did it at over 60. Give yourself time and love….. your body has been working overtime being a baby machine, and it’s hard on the system, natural or not.
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  Yes, a baby machine! Hahaha! That’s definitely how I feel. 😉 Thanks for reading and commenting.
  - Francesca Amodeo
    
    Welcome:). But really - do give yourself time and love. I am constantly in awe of women who have babies. It’s a lot of strain on the system, and then there’s all the mother work and the home work and then the sometimes (most times?) outside wage work - how in the hell do you all do it? Total admiration.
justine

I gained over sixty pounds each time I was pregnant with my four kids. It took a year to lose the weight each time. I had to watch my diet and went to the gym about 4 days a week but I did get back to normal each time. Weight lifting and cross fit is the best way to recover your muscle tone. Keep your chin up and do your chin ups! And your squats and burpees….
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  You look fabulous, Justine. Such an inspiration to me for sure! Thank you for reading and commenting. 😉
Kelly Tuttle

I had my 4th child in January 2014- I can so totally relate. The first 3 I gained between 28-35 lbs, the 4th- 50 lbs! It was so hard to lose the weight too. I’ve been running for the past 9 years, and that always worked, but it was just harder this time, probably because I’m 36 (was 35 at the time), and my metabolism is not what it was. Only recently my husband and I started working out with a trainer and it has made a huge difference. But I spent a lot of time after I had the babies, wanting the weight to just fall off magically so I could feel normal again. You’ve been thru this so you know you will return to your normal too! And for the record- you look beautiful! I’m completely flat chested so after my babies I always had a nice flat chest (even with breastfeeding- still flat chested!) and my post baby tummy stuck farther out than my chest.
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  Hehe, my chest isn’t currently very flat, and I still think my belly pokes out farther than it does. I think I need some SPANX! Ha! 😉 Thanks for reading and commenting.
Lisa / Frogginette

Just for the record, you do look great This is something I’m experiencing too. Add the grey hairs that started appearing after my second was born and I don’t know, a generalized puffiness around the eyes I guess? As far as weight, the disheartening part for me was that I lost most of the weight (mostly because I had was on an elimination diet because of my second’s intolerances/allergies) relatively quickly only to gain it back after I weaned (too much stress with 2 little ones, no exercise…) So I’ve decided to take things one thing at a time and focus on health: I’ve started running early this spring (couch to 5K) which I have really enjoyed to my utmost surprise. All of a sudden, no more various aches and pains and flabbiness. I have some very supportive friends (and husband!) who are cheering me along with every small victory. I have nixed the chocolate/cookies/mindless eating. Still have a ways to go with the weight but as I get older I don’t despair about the road still ahead, taking it one day at a time works well for me now.
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  Lisa, you are too kind. Thank you for reading and commenting. I’m going to take your advice and try to get healthy (diet/exercise)! My husband swears it will help. 😉
http://www.SewnForYOUbyME.etsy.com Michelle E

Lauren, I have a feeling that when you revisit this issue you will have a different view of yourself altogether. Like you said, it’s only been a month… hormones are still running wild and for some awful reason, we women always seem to be so hard on ourselves when we really should be celebrating the miraculous process our bodies just went through.

I am a mother of 4… I had my first at (a fresh) 21 years and my last at 44 years of age… each pregnancy and recovery was different, and like you, I was very hard (down?) on myself… We need to give ourselves (psyche and bodies) a break!

Don’t forget that our children pick up on our negative body issues too. I hope I don’t sound preachy, it’s just that at 53 years on this Earth I’m finally seeing how horribly we woman (and I’ve been at the top of this list) treat ourselves.

Love YOU and the rest/BEST will follow! Congrats on your new little human!
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  You’re right on so many accounts! I try to be very careful about how I talk about my appearance in front of the kids. I have way too many issues from remembering my mother talk poorly about herself when I was young (and still today). Thanks for the reminder. 😉
Dollofmalice

Oh man, postpartum body is hard, especially when you are used to seeing yourself a certain way. I had 5 babies by a time I was 30, really about 4 months shy of 30. And it is hard to see yourself when you were fit and thin. I always waver with my health and well being. Take care of my diet, eat healthy, exercise, then get tired of the regimen. However, now that I am older, and my health is not the same, it take a lot more work. Remember to give yourself time and take it slow. Remember we are the only culture who acts like woman didn’t just give life to another. It is a process and you can get healthy without killing yourself.
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  Yes, a process…a long and very tiring process. I’m trying to remind myself of that and to take it slow and steady. Thanks for reading and commenting!
Sara C

Looks like a lot of us can relate! I had 6 before my 30th. Pregnancy can really take a toll on your body when you have them right in a row. I’ve had a 2 year break now and I am just starting to feel “normal” again. I love the babies, but taking a break to heal has been really good for me too. Besides having kids, there really are changes that happen to your body in your 30’s. I noticed that over the past couple of years my friends’ conversations have switched from talking about babies and marriages to talking about aches and pains. It’s funny how that happens…
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  Wow, 6??!! You are my hero! Yeah, the aches and pains. I’m hoping that improving my diet and exercising more will help. Fingers crossed!
Melanie

I know how you feel- my baby just turned one and I still don’t have my old body back, but I have done nothing to get it there so I can’t complain much After my first daughter was born, one of the most difficult things for me was recognizing myself. The stretch marks that don’t go away, the droopy boobs, the wider hips, etc. It was like I had to get to know myself all over again. The selfishness in me was pretty upset about it. I’ll never be what I was before I had babies, it took a while to realize that. BUT, those scars and sags are like medals of honor, I guess. It takes a constant reminding, especially fresh out of the shower! Also, I bought a push-up-bra for the first time and I feel like a whole new woman, ha ha ha!
- http://www.laurendahl.com/ Lauren Dahl
  
  I can’t WAIT to be able to wear a proper bra!! Hehe…thanks for reading and commenting.

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